Well, we've visited a few Colonial restorations in our day as a family. My kids would always go, "No, not a tour!" But it's interesting if you get involved with some of the craftsmen. You can pretty much judge what it will be like before you get there.
Oh, it was a great time to be traveling out East! I got to be there at cherry blossom time this year. I was where those pink beauties were popping out everywhere we were traveling. One of the gals on the Weather Channel was broadcasting from Washington, DC, and she had this beautiful backdrop of these exploding cherry blossoms at the Jefferson Memorial.
I remember the night I was asked to speak at an adult couples thing at our church. And they did this auction sort of deal; in fact it was sort of a "Let's Make a Deal" game. I think some people call it a White Elephant Auction or something. It's the kind of game where you go to your garage and you get something you really want to throw away, and then you wrap it up in real pretty paper and you bring it to the auction. And what happens is this: One person goes up and has to pick one of those packages, and they open it and then they have it. From that point on everyone can either take an unwrapped package and take their chances on that, or they can trade for something that's already been unwrapped that looks interesting.
I was on an airplane flight and I overheard a conversation in the seats behind me. Okay, I eavesdropped on the conversation behind me. All right! In any case, there was this little boy flying with his Dad and he was full of questions...the little boy that is. He said, "Daddy, what are all those lights for? Daddy, why did part of the wing go down? Daddy, why is it called Lake Erie?" See, the pilot told us the name of it, but he didn't necessarily tell us why.
Parenting is not a precise science, you might say; you don't just mix certain ingredients and get a certain reaction. In fact, it's largely experimental. But after a while you learn more creative ways to do what is right. Now you can yell, you can overpower, you can threaten them until they're bigger than you are. Or you can work through the method I came to call "The Squeeze." It's a method that steers a child to the right choice. It's also known as "The Lousy Choice" approach.
I didn't realize all the things that our uncle pays for. I mean, Uncle Sam, that is. Well, you know again, a while back they were talking about a government shutdown. It's happened before; it will probably happen again when there's political deadlock in Washington. But as they talked about it, they started to reveal all the things that wouldn't happen if the government shut down; all the people and the services that would feel the pain if Uncle Sam didn't get some money. For example, it looked like America's military and government workers might not get paid, and they're doing more things for us than we ever realized, and they wouldn't be seeing their paycheck on time. It looked like even our National Parks were going to be affected. Can you imagine Smokey the Bear not getting paid?
I was zipping down the Interstate one day, and I came up behind this big, black truck with bright red letters on it. And then I noticed what it said: County Bomb Squad. Needless to say, I didn't stay real close to that truck! I didn't want to be behind those guys, but I'm actually glad they're around.
In all the years we were raising our family, we didn't have a dog at our house. One big reason is that dogs have a non-negotiable need to be walked. We've had some fish. Our fish never needed to be taken for a walk. We had a parrot. It's very hard to walk a parrot.
I've never been a mother. You probably guessed that, but I have talked to a lot of them. In fact, one of my very best friends on earth is a mother; in fact a couple of them. And I understand that the nine months of waiting for a baby...I guess it's fun at the beginning, but it gets a little long about the eighth or ninth month.
My kids always loved that amusement park ride where they get to drive those little race cars around this track. I guess I should put the word "drive" in quotes. Oh yeah, kids grab that steering wheel and they do their NASCAR thing as the car speeds around that track at this eye-blurring three or four miles an hour or something. I could hardly blink. But driving, well that's a bit of an overstatement. See, that car is attached to a little rail, and it's going to go where it's going to go, no matter how what little Miss or Mr. NASCAR does at the wheel. We won't tell them, but they're not really in control at all.
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